Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Trek Ma

   This summer, for Youth Conference, the youth in my Stake are going on a Pioneer Trek.   Because I have been on Trek before and I know what an amazing experience it is for the youth and the adults, I wanted to go.  But for the most part, the Stake is not using Youth Leaders for Ma's and Pa's and I am a Young Women's Leader.  Darn!
   I went to the Trek Fireside a few months ago.  I was thrilled to find out that one of the Ma's was a single sister and that she would be going as a single Ma--not two single people acting as Ma and Pa together, like I had done several years ago, but she is going to be a single parent on the Trek.  
   After the Fireside, I sought her out to talk to her.  Maria is in her late thirties and she is the Young Women's President in her ward.  We talked for a few minutes and I told her how excited I was that she was going.  I told her I was single and I strained to hold back my tears because she would be representing single sisters.  Our conversation was short, but I have thought a lot about her since that night at the Fireside.  
    Another friend of mine expressed a desire to go on Trek as a Ma to her Stake President a few years ago.  He simple said, "Well, you can't go."  She asked why not and he responded, "Well, you're not married."  She asked him what that had to do with anything.  Bless his heart, he didn't get it.  Marriage is vitally important and we surely want the youth to see successful marriages, but is marriage a  qualifier for service in the Kingdom?  Is marriage a qualifier for righteous living?  
    What about Mary Fielding Smith???   She came across the plains as a SINGLE MOTHER!  In fact, she raised a prophet!  A single mother!  What about all the other single women who crossed the plains?  Women whose husbands refused to come, women whose husbands died on the journey, women who came alone because they loved the Gospel, wanted to follow Christ, and enjoy fellowship with the Saints.  Did they not sacrifice as much as married women who crossed the plains?  Perhaps they sacrificed even more.  
    At Girls Camp, I was able to sneak away from the activities my new found friend, Maria, for a moment to tell her that I had been thinking about her and praying for her.  We had a very tender conversation as we discussed what it meant for her to be going on Trek.  I told her that during Trek, I would be in Chile, visiting a friend.  When it would be especially demanding emotionally, physically, or mentally, I wanted her to know that there would be someone praying for her and thinking about her in Chile.   She will be representing so much for so many single women on this Trek.  
    Many of the youth are being raised by single mothers.  Some of the young women on the Trek will never marry.  Some of them will unfortunately get divorced.  Some of them may marry, but because of choices their husbands will make, they will be required to pull the handcart alone as they bring their children to church or gather them for family prayer, without support from their spouse.  
    We laughed as she said there were a few awkward moments at the Ma/Pa Training overnighter.  A few times the leaders asked everyone to do little activities with their spouse.  Um.  OK.  Awkward!  
      We cried as we knew the hardships that were ahead of her.  We cried as we knew the depth of her role in the eyes of those who would be in her "family" and others on the Trek that would be watching her.  A simple embrace through our tears was given to let her know that I truly understood her emotions, heart ache, fear, faith, and determination.  


    I am so grateful for a Stake Presidency who had the compassion, vision, foresight, and faith to call a single woman to shoulder the task of being a single Ma on Trek.  I was able to catch each of them at YW Camp and barely choke out my gratitude for how much it meant to have them call a single sister to be a Ma.  Thank you for acknowledging those of us who continue to valiantly put our shoulders to the wheel, regardless of our marital status.  
     I wanted to send Maria an email after camp--a member of the Stake YW Presidency said this about her in response to my request for her email address," She is just golden!  There is no other way to describe her."  After talking to her at camp, I already knew this about her.  
      Here is an article I remember reading from the Ensign that I sent to Maria: 

         "Julia and Emily: Sisters in Zion"  Ensign June 2004

             http://www.lds.org/ensign/2004/06/julia-and-emily-sisters-in-zion?lang=eng

    It was written by a descendant of the Willie Handcart Company.  She writes about her ancestors--two sisters who joined the Church in England.  After their parents disowned them, they journeyed together to America and finally to Utah--they were both SINGLE SISTERS.  In fact, one of them penned the hymn beloved by women of the Church, "As Sisters In Zion"  (Hymn #309).

     Whether married or single, as women, we are truly given the errand of angels.  This week on Trek, Maria will be representing single sisters in the church all over the world as she treks with the youth on the plains of Wyoming.  


1. As sisters in Zion, we'll all work together;
The blessings of God on our labors we'll seek.
We'll build up his kingdom with earnest endeavor;
We'll comfort the weary and strengthen the weak.
2. The errand of angels is given to women;
And this is a gift that, as sisters, we claim:
To do whatsoever is gentle and human,
To cheer and to bless in humanity's name.
3. How vast is our purpose, how broad is our mission,
If we but fulfill it in spirit and deed.
Oh, naught but the Spirit's divinest tuition
Can give us the wisdom to truly succeed.

5 comments:

  1. LOVE THIS! LOVE YOU!!!! Thanks for being SO STALWART!!!!:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, I join my gratitude with yours for the caring, inspired, and faithful Stake Presidency! Why hasn't this been done before? Anyone who has read any amount of church history would be well aware that marriage is not a requisite for service in building the kingdom!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is so beautiful Melanie. Sometimes we forget that although marriage is beautiful and important, God loves us first as individuals. He know us as individuals and He accepts all of our offerings in all of life's moments. Love you!

    ReplyDelete
  4. You have a wonderful way of reaching people - I am so impressed with your love for and toward Maria in support of her going on Trek. Everyone needs to have a friend like you!

    ReplyDelete