I scheduled mine for the week of my birthday. Oh, so much fun. Not. I had to laugh that the waiting area resembles a spa.
After my "fun" I went to change out of the of beautifully attractive hospital gown. There was one other woman in the waiting area. As I tried to open my locker where my clothes resided, I couldn't get the key to work. I tried several times. It wouldn't open. I was sure that I had the right locker. The key went in the keyhole, but would not turn. Remember how I am in a nice hospital gown? Yeah, well I had to use one hand to keep the gown closed to avoid from exposing myself and struggle with the other hand trying to get the key to work. The other waiting room lady must have thought I was a real idiot--I mean it is not rocket science to open a simple locker with a key, right? She was probably thinking I had the wrong locker, but I didn't, OK, lady? Was I supposed to waltz out of the waiting area and ask the receptionist for help in my stunning attire? I was starting to sweat, when I took out the key--which fit perfectly inside the key hole--and put the key in backwards. It worked. What the? How often have you put in a key that fits both ways into a keyhole? Ugh. People, don't do that in a waiting area in a woman's center that is already filled with awkward feelings! As I left the "spa" I saw a CD player. I lifted the lid and chuckled as I saw the CD: Yanni! As I strolled out, I turned up the volume button and pressed play--surely Yanni would lighten the tenseness of the visit for others. I laughed at my cleverness as I left.
The next week, I got a call from my regular doctor...the doctor from the mammogram office called my regular doctor to tell her that he found something that concerned him from my testing. I was requested to go in for "further testing." They had found some asymmetrical cell tissue. I was not expecting that phone call! Super unsettling.
The day after I received the call, although I tried to suppress my thoughts, I kept imagining what the "further testing" would entail and why I needed "further testing." I couldn't concentrate and I was a little emotional all day. Well, I had my "follow-up exam" for "further testing" and the doctor said the abnormalities were just lymph nodes. Big fat PHEW! I guess many women are called back for "further testing" after their first mammogram because often there may be something found that appears abnormal and the medical staff don't have any information to compare to previous x-rays. What might be normal for one person, may not be normal for another person.
Before I found out "my normal" was normal for me, I started to think about what would happen if I had cancer? Have I lived the life I needed to live? What could I have done different to avoid cancer? My thoughts became consumed with the wonderment of the human body. Our bodies are truly a gift. I know after we die, some day, we will all be resurrected, because of Christ's Atonement. I know this. However, something I don't know is how long we will have to wait to be resurrected. That will happen after Christ comes again. If I died today, I don't know how long my spirit will be without my body. I also don't know what a spirit can do without a body. As I was pondering on this, I started thinking of all the things I am grateful I can do with my body. I think the human body is under-rated. Just take a minute and think of the wonders the human body can do and all we can experience because we have one.
These are some things that I will miss when I no longer have a body:
- Giving hugs
- Receiving hugs
- Eating cotton candy and feeling the texture on my tongue
- Eating cookie dough
- Eating brownie batter
- Putting Blitex on chapped lips
- Going snowshoeing
- Sleeping on super fluffy feather pillows
- Sleeping with super cuddly blankets
- Hot showers
- Smelling brownies cooking
- The moment right after I brush my teeth
- The texture and taste of chips and salsa
- Wearing socks
- Wearing slippers
- The crunch of freshly picked green beans
- Riding on Tower of Terror
- Going on walks
- Canoeing
- Watching a sunset
- Smelling clean laundry
- Listening to good music
- Snowboarding
- Eating Tim Tams and the melting yumminess of a Tim Tam Slam on my tongue
- Smelling campfire
- Eating Oreos dunked in milk
- Driving a car
- Endorphins released while laughing
- Licking ice cream
- Smelling homemade bread fresh out of the oven
- Holding a microphone and speaking in front of a crowd
- Taking power naps
- Wearing sweat shirts
- Smelling Bath and Body Works lotions
- The zing of cilantro and lime together
- Back massages
- Singing
- Lotion on my hands
- Good hair days
- Smelling lilacs
- Crunching fall leaves under my feet during Autumn
- Eating Indian Food
- Kissing babies
What will you miss when you no longer have your body?
“We are dual beings. Each soul is
comprised of body and spirit, both of which emanate from God. A firm
understanding of body and spirit will shape our thoughts and deeds for good.
The marvel of our physical bodies is
often overlooked. Who has not encountered feelings of low self-esteem because
of physique or appearance? Many people wish their bodies could be more to their
liking. Some with naturally straight hair want it curly. Others with curly hair
want it straight. Occasionally some ladies, believing that “gentlemen prefer
blonds,” become “decided blonds.”
Your body, whatever its natural gifts, is
a magnificent creation of God. It is a tabernacle of flesh—a temple
for your spirit. A study of your body attests to its divine design.” --Elder Russell M. Nelson, General
Conference October 1998
