Things I Would Miss

      Last year my mission companion turned forty and went to get a mammogram.  Cancer.  Ugh.  She has four children and has really been thorough the ringer (no pun intended) with treatments and surgery.  Although it has been a rough go, she is not shy to encourage everyone to get their routine mammogram.
I scheduled mine for the week of my birthday.  Oh, so much fun.  Not.  I had to laugh that the waiting area resembles a spa.
     After my "fun" I went to change out of the of beautifully attractive hospital gown.  There was one other woman in the waiting area.  As I tried to open my locker where my clothes resided, I couldn't get the key to work.  I tried several times.  It wouldn't open.  I was sure that I had the right locker.  The key went in the keyhole, but would not turn.  Remember how I am in a nice hospital gown?  Yeah, well I had to use one hand to keep the gown closed to avoid from exposing myself and struggle with the other hand trying to get the key to work.  The other waiting room lady must have thought I was a real idiot--I mean it is not rocket science to open a simple locker with a key, right?  She was probably thinking I had the wrong locker, but I didn't, OK, lady?  Was I supposed to waltz out of the waiting area and ask the receptionist for help in my stunning attire?  I was starting to sweat, when I took out the key--which fit perfectly inside the key hole--and put the key in backwards.  It worked.  What the?  How often have you put in a key that fits both ways into a keyhole?  Ugh.  People, don't do that in a waiting area in a woman's center that is already filled with awkward feelings!   As I left the "spa" I saw a CD player.  I lifted the lid and chuckled as I saw the CD:  Yanni!  As I strolled out, I turned up the volume button and pressed play--surely Yanni would lighten the tenseness of the visit for others.  I laughed at my cleverness as I left. 
     The next week, I got a call from my regular doctor...the doctor from the mammogram office called my regular doctor to tell her that he found something that concerned him from my testing.  I was requested to go in for "further testing."  They had found some asymmetrical cell tissue.  I was not expecting that phone call!  Super unsettling.
     The day after I received the call, although I tried to suppress my thoughts, I kept imagining what the "further testing" would entail and why I needed "further testing."  I couldn't concentrate and I was a little emotional all day.  Well, I had my "follow-up exam" for "further testing" and the doctor said the abnormalities were just lymph nodes.  Big fat PHEW!   I guess many women are called back for "further testing" after their first mammogram because often there may be something found that appears abnormal and the medical staff don't have any information to compare to previous x-rays.  What might be normal for one person, may not be normal for another person.
     Before I found out "my normal" was normal for me, I started to think about what would happen if I had cancer?  Have I lived the life I needed to live?  What could I have done different to avoid cancer?  My thoughts became consumed with the wonderment of the human body.  Our bodies are truly a gift.  I know after we die, some day, we will all be resurrected, because of Christ's Atonement.  I know this.  However, something I don't know is how long we will have to wait to be resurrected.  That will happen after Christ comes again.  If I died today, I don't know how long my spirit will be without my body.  I also don't know what a spirit can do without a body.  As I was pondering on this, I started thinking of all the things I am grateful I can do with my body.  I think the human body is under-rated.  Just take a minute and think of the wonders the human body can do and all we can experience because we have one.

These are some things that I will miss when I no longer have a body:

• Giving hugs
• Receiving hugs
• Eating cotton candy and feeling the texture on my tongue
• Eating cookie dough
• Eating brownie batter
• Putting Blitex on chapped lips
• Going snowshoeing
• Sleeping on super fluffy feather pillows
• Sleeping with super cuddly blankets
• Hot showers
• Smelling brownies cooking 
• The moment right after I brush my teeth
• The texture  and taste of chips and salsa
• Wearing socks 
• Wearing slippers
• The crunch of freshly picked green beans
• Riding on Tower of Terror 
• Going on walks
• Canoeing
• Watching a sunset
• Smelling clean laundry
• Listening to good music
• Snowboarding
• Eating Tim Tams and the melting yumminess of a Tim Tam Slam on my tongue
• Smelling campfire
• Eating Oreos dunked in milk
• Driving a car
• Endorphins released while laughing
• Licking ice cream
• Smelling homemade bread fresh out of the oven
• Holding a microphone and speaking in front of a crowd
• Taking power naps
• Wearing sweat shirts
• Smelling Bath and Body Works lotions
• The zing of cilantro and lime together
• Back massages
• Singing 
• Lotion on my hands
• Good hair days
• Smelling lilacs
• Crunching fall leaves under my feet during Autumn
• Eating Indian Food
• Kissing babies

    I'm glad my "further testing" proved normal for me and I am glad I will continue to be able to enjoy the many things listed above.  This experience has deepened my appreciation for the gift of my body.   

What will you miss when you no longer have your body?

     “We are dual beings. Each soul is comprised of body and spirit, both of which emanate from God. A firm understanding of body and spirit will shape our thoughts and deeds for good.

      The marvel of our physical bodies is often overlooked. Who has not encountered feelings of low self-esteem because of physique or appearance? Many people wish their bodies could be more to their liking. Some with naturally straight hair want it curly. Others with curly hair want it straight. Occasionally some ladies, believing that “gentlemen prefer blonds,” become “decided blonds.”

      Your body, whatever its natural gifts, is a magnificent creation of God. It is a tabernacle of flesh—a temple for your spirit. A study of your body attests to its divine design.”        --Elder Russell M. Nelson, General Conference   October 1998   

 (Great talk about the wonders of the human body, including the heart, the ear, the skin, etc.  Read this talk for greater appreciation of your body.)

Valentine's Awkward Moment

     A few weeks ago, I was getting some ice at Taco Time because they have that yummy small pellet crunchy ice that you can't get anywhere else--it goes perfect in "Young Women Punch" or Neil Diamond "Love on the Rocks Punch" (I will disclose the recipe below). As I was waiting, I noticed on the counter some small pieces of paper and a sign for a Taco Time Drawing.  Sweet!
     Some where in my DNA make-up is a gene that increases blood flow every time there is a contest or drawing.  Blood flows faster and heart rate increases as out family sees an opportunity to enter.  Not only do we feel a need to enter contests, we often WIN.  In fact, we started a blog that logs all of our winnings (let me know if you want the link).   We have won gift cards, milk for a year, concert tickets, movie premiere tickets, etc.
     Upon seeing the drawing papers, I knew I needed to enter.  There was some Valentine contest and some weekly free meal drawing.  So, of course, I entered both.
     Last week I got a message that I won!  Wahoo!  I called the lady to claim my prize and here's where the awkward moment arises...I won the "Dinner for Lovers."  Um, I don't really have a lover.  The win includes a three course catered meal (I was excited about the free food), a bouquet of flowers for the "lady" of the couple, and a photo of the couple so it could be displayed in the resturant with thier story.   How could I tell the nice lady that I didn't have a spouse, significant other, or even a date?  I thought, maybe I would just bring a friend, but that wouldn't look right for a "Lover's Dinner."  I thought, maybe I could take my dad?  Yeah, that wouldn't look right either--besides, he's on a cruise.  What now?  So, I am giving the winning to a friend whose husband is out of work.  I'm just sad about missing the free food.  :)  
     Although there are awkward moments as a single person, and some of them may happen around Valentine's Day, there are also moments to love and be loved.  If you read my blog last year in February, you heard about a new tradition I started for myself for Valentine's Day.  Yesterday, I gave flowers to two co-workers who are going through some rough times and I'm sure this year's Valentine's Day will not be their favorite.  What a sweet experience it was to see their faces when they saw the flowers.  I don't know if it made their day, but it sure made mine!  

     Who needs your love or friendship this year on Valentine Day?  How can you show them someone cares?


Here is the recipe I mentioned-

YW/Love on the Rocks Punch:
2   2 Liter Bottles of Diet Grapefruit Shasta
1    Can White Grape Juice Concentrate
1    Bag of Taco Time Ice

Mix and serve in large punch bowl--surprise all your guests with this yummy beverage they won't forget! 



“I believe that for most of us the best medicine for loneliness is work, service in behalf of others. I do not minimize your problems, but I do not hesitate to say that there are many others whose problems are more serious than are yours. Reach out to serve them, to help them, to encourage them. There are so many boys and girls who fail in school for want of a little personal attention and encouragement. There are so many elderly people who live in misery and loneliness and fear for whom a simple conversation would bring a measure of hope and happiness.”  -President Gordon B. Hinckley    General Conference October 1996

Christmas Tears

     For the Christmas holidays, I visited my youngest sister and her family.  We had a nativity on Christmas Eve, opened presents Christmas morning, and then we went to my sister's in-laws' house for a few days.

     Sometimes I remember to bring fun activities or books read with my nieces and nephews--sometimes I forget.  This time I remembered to pack some Christmas books to read together.  These simple picture books provided one of the sweetest moments I had this year for Christmas.  After waking up, some of my nieces wanted to cuddle with me on Nana's couch.  It was a perfect moment for story time.  Snuggled up close, toasty in our Christmas PJ's and new blankets from Nana, I started to read.  I looked over and a pair of pail blues eyes were looking up at us.  This blue eyed six year old was my sister's niece whose mother passed away in May from breast cancer.  I invited her to join us and after a little coaxing, she snuggled right in.  My heart almost burst as I realized, she didn't have a mommy to cuddle with and read stories.  How long before her mom passed away did she have a moment like this?  It was as if her little spirit was craving a mother figure's affection.  My eyes watered and my voice cracked as I realized what was happening in this moment.  I wanted to cuddle her closer and read stories with these little girls all day.  Nothing else mattered at that moment.  God gave me the gift of mothering at that moment to a six year old girl who so desperately needed it.  We both needed it. 

     The previous day I purchased items to make Rice Krispie Treats with Christmas M&M's.  I started to pour the marshmallows into the bowl when the blue-eyed six year old entered the kitchen.  She looked up at me with curious, shy eyes and I asked if she wanted to help.  A quick, silent nod.  I asked her if she had ever make Rice Krispie Treats.  With a furrowed brow and look to the floor, the answer and nod of the head to indicate "no." My heart broke again.  Who will make RKT with this six year old?  Who will she learn to cook from?  Who will take her shopping?  Who will tuck her in a night when Dad has to work late or is helping older brother or sister with homework?  Her sweet dad is doing a great job--he really is a wonderful father who is now trying to be both parents, while grieving himself.  Doing this holiday thing alone is new--he is trying to figure out how to make it work.

     Christmas without her mom.  What would that be like for a six year old?  I reflected on her first concern when her mother passed away, "But who will plan my birthday party now?"    I caught myself looking at her and her older brother (eight years old) and sister (twelve years old)  several times throughout week with wet eyes. What daily challenges do they face that are multiplied because they don't have a mother to kiss their "owies" all better?  I just wanted to hug them forever. 

     The next day, my top priority was to make sure we made cookies together.  I couldn't let the week to pass without making sure she had the chance to do what mommies do with their little girls--make cookies.  The other little girls were also anxious to help.  Eight eager hands made making cookies a bit challenging and messy and I loved every minute of it.  My heart broke and eyes watered as this adopted blue-eyed niece (adopted by me) said,  "I haven't made cookies in for forever.  I don't ever make cookies with my dad."  I was so grateful I acted upon the thought to make her feel special and create a Christmas memory with her. 

     My favorite gift this Christmas was a few short mothering moments to three children who missed their own mother.


        "In my experience I have seen that some of the truest mother hearts beat in the breasts of women who will not rear their own children in this life, but they know that “all things must come to pass in their time” and that they “are laying the foundation of a great work” (D&C 64:32–33)."  -Sister Julie B. Beck, "A Mother Heart," General Conference, April 2004

Home Teachers to the Rescue!

     Last month I finally got Home Teachers.  Instead of waiting for them to set an appointment with me, I set an appointment with them.  I think sometimes HT don't realize how important it is to single women to have diligent home teachers who actually make a monthly home visit.  Oh, wait, isn't that how it is supposed to be?  Yes, even if an individual or family is doing well, or appears to be doing well, Home Teaching is important.  I have a friend whose marriage and family life appears to be honkey dorey from the outside, but inside the home, the marriage is struggling and testimonies are faltering.  Her Home Teacher came over last month (first time they'd had Home Teachers in several months) and he left a General Conference talk and a challenge.  He had no idea that his simple challenge changed that family.
       I'm sure you are curious about MY new Home Teachers and the title to this blog post.  Well, they came over, as scheduled by me, shared a nice message and asked if there was anything they could do for me.  At the moment, I had nothing, but I assured them I would find something.  Yesterday, I found something.  A dead bird!  Gross!  A dead bird on my back porch.  Ugh.  I have no idea where it came from (well, yeah, the sky, but why was it on my porch?).  I almost puked.  The thought of picking it up caused me to dry heave and run into the house for fresh air that didn't have dead bird air wafting close to my nostrils.  How in the world was I going to get rid of it?  Oh, wait, I was not going to get rid of it...this was a job for the Home Teachers!  Yes!  I had found something for them to do.   I knew they would be thrilled with an opportunity to serve!
        So this afternoon, I called one of my HT's wife's.  I told her about the dead bird on the porch and asked if he could help out.  She assured me her husband could take care of it and as we tried to coordinate schedules, we decided I didn't need to be home and he could come through the back gate and take care of the deceased.
       I got home from work and two of the popsicle kids came over for candy and to look at my garden they helped tend while I was traveling this summer.  I noticed the bird was gone.  Hooray!  The Home Teacher was quick about his daring duty. 
     Now, you may call me a whimp or a sissy, I will proudly claim those titles.  I don't know if I am physically able to handle disposing of a dead bird.  I continue to dry heaved writing this post. 
      I went merrily on my way to our Young Women's activity and after, I received this text from the HT's wife:
           
      Hey, my husband just got back from your house.  I thought you said it was a bird but he said it was a kitten.  I could have misheard you...I have a hard time understanding other people on the phone.

My response:

     Ah!  It WAS a bird!  It was gone so I thought he came!  Was there a dead cat?!?  EWWWWWWWWWWW!   Did it eat the dead bird ???

Her response:

        Yes, it was a dead kitten.  Maybe the kitten ate the bird.


     Gagging sounds coming from me.   What in the heck?  I had a dead bird AND a dead cat in my back yard!?!?   I had no idea there was a pet cemetery in my backyard.  What a nightmare.   All I have to say is THANK HEAVENS FOR HOME TEACHERS!



"If you’ll think about the families you visit, those of you who are blessed to be called home teachers, you know the help they need is beyond your casual effort."  Elder Henry B. Eyring, April 1998

Member Care

          Last month, I was blessed to go to England to see the British Pageant.  Because I am single, I don't have permanent travel companion.  I have had many WONDERFUL and FUN travel companions in the past, but for this trip, trying to find someone to go to England with was a little challenging.  I asked my VT companion, former roommates, married friends, single friends, etc.  however no one could leave their kids, take the time off work, justify the cost, etc.  I had the time, money saved, etc. and I really wanted to see the Pageant, so I decided to go anyway.  Luckily, I have a former college roommate, Terisha, whose husband is stationed in England and I was able to stay with her for most of my trip.  She showed me around and did some sight seeing with me in London.  Don't hate me, but while I was in England, I toured the Harry Potter Movie Studio!  Yes, I cried I was so excited.

Gryffindor Commons Room

Riding the Night Bus

I saw "Warhorse" and "Wicked."   LOVED them both!!!!   We rented bikes and rode around the city--neither of us had been on a bike for several years and I was in a skirt--it was a fun adventure.  We also drove to the London Temple. 

   

       Terisha's Stake chartered a bus to drive up to the Pageant and I rode with them.   My plane home was out of the Manchester airport, so I had to stay the night by myself in Chorley, while she returned home on the bus with the Stake.  The Pageant was AMAZING!  My friend, Alex Mackenzie Johns, directed it and another friend, Charly Burridge Jones, was the stage manager (I met them both while working on the Nauvoo Pageant).

     I didn't know how I was going to get from the Pageant to my hotel.  I knew some other friends from the Nauvoo Pageant were going to be there, but I also knew they probably would not have cars--I was right.    The Pageant ended at 10:15 p.m.  I saw a few friends, but they were all from the U.S. and...none of them had cars or a way to help me get to my hotel.  I didn't really know how to get to there by foot and it was dark--probably not the safest for a single gal.  I kept trying to see if any of my friends were going in the direction of my hotel--nothing. 
       After the cast prayer at 11:00 p.m. and still no prospects of shuttle service, I started to get worried.  I kept praying that I would find someone that could take me.  Because I was unfamiliar with the area, my friend gave me her laptop to look it up on Mapquest.  I had to go to the Stake Center up the hill to get WIFI.  On my way, I was feeling desperate.  As I passed by cast members and audience members, to no one in particular, I asked, "Anyone going to the Travel Lodge?" (of course, I said this in an English accent).    I kept asking, hopeful that someone would be headed in that direction.  No one.  Some ladies, dressed in Pageant costumes, like everyone else, said they were not staying there as they started their car.  I moved on and then they called out and asked me which Travel Lodge.  I told them and even though they were not staying at the hotel, they offered to drive me!  So, I was taken to my hotel by some cast members--Mormons I had never met before.  They were so kind and eager to help me in my desperation.  I finally learned their names as we headed for the hotel.  I don't know what I would have done, had they not offered me a ride.  They were truly an answer to prayer.

These are the darling ladies that drove me to my hotel.

      Sunday morning I arranged for a taxi to take me to church, but I didn't know how I was going to get from the church to the bus station to get to the airport.  I entered the building with my luggage and the first people I met were Senior Missionaries from Utah.  They had only been in England two weeks.  They offered to take me to the bus station, but they said they still were learning how to drive in England and didn't know their way around.  We took my luggage to their car to be stored during church meetings.  I attend Relief Society and basked in the spirit of Pageant aftermath excitement. 
      At the opening of Sunday School, the Senior Missionary pulled me aside and said he found someone else (during Elder's Quorum) to take me to the bus station.  He introduced me and we exchanged greetings as the lesson began.  The man leaned over to his wife and whispered something.  He turned back to me said before he took me to the bus station,  he and his wife would like to have me join them for dinner.   I had only been in the church building for a little over an hour and I had my luggage safely stored, secured a ride to the bus station, and sweetly been given a dinner invitation. Sunday dinner had already been planned for family members and some friends visiting for the Pageant--easy at pie to add one more Mormon to the menu.  Who does that?  I didn't even know his name and in a hour, I would be eating pickled beets and mashed potatoes in his home. 
       After a delicious dinner and delightful conversation, my new friends drove me not just to the bus station, but all the way to the airport!  

These are the folks I ate Sunday dinner with in Chorley.

      I feel so fortunate to belong to a church that takes care of its people.  It is comforting to know that I can go anywhere in the world, and I can immediately find kindred spirits and kind souls.  As members of the same faith, we know we have similar goals and desires.  We want to be like Jesus Christ.  We live to take care of each other.  My experience in England was just one more example of  "Member Care."

BTW, We don't just take care of our people...
        "Using funds donated by generous members, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints sends food, clothing, and other essentials to relieve the suffering of adults and children all over the world. These humanitarian donations, totaling hundreds of millions of dollars in the last decade, are made without any consideration of religion, race, or nationality. 
        Our massive relief effort following the 2011 Japanese earthquake and tsunami provided $13 million in cash and relief supplies. In addition, more than 31,000 Church-sponsored volunteers gave more than 600,000 hours of service. Our humanitarian assistance to the victims of Hurricane Sandy in the eastern United States included large donations of various resources, plus almost 300,000 hours of service in cleanup efforts by about 28,000 Church members. Among many other examples last year, we provided 300,000 pounds (136,000 kg) of clothing and shoes for the refugees in the African nation of Chad. During the last quarter century we have assisted nearly 30 million people in 179 countries. Truly, the people called “Mormons” know how to give to the poor and needy." 
       -Elder Dallin H. Oaks at the April 2013 General Conference